If it Hurts, Be Honest

Imagine if we have a deadly illness, but we deny we have it. In that case we would ignore all treatment, and not even think about treatment. Of course we can’t heal from an illness if we deny we even have it!! It’s the same way with the trauma of our childhood wounds. If we deny we were traumatized by our childhood, we won’t heal from the aftereffects trauma creates.

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Hello Readers, hope all’s well. Time for another post.

We all have a story. And we all have something from our past that causes us pain. Something from our childhood that hurt, and continues to cause us hurt and pain today. Almost everyone has a trauma. Life here in this fallen world is guaranteed to be tough, because we’re separated from God, the source of our comfort and peace.

Pain is a guarantee. But there are things we can do to make this easier or harder on ourselves. One of the very worst things we could ever do is to deny that we have pain and trauma. We do ourselves NO GOOD by denying our wounds or our pain. Denial works against us on many levels, Spiritual and otherwise.

If we want healing in our lives, we have to be honest about our pain—honest with ourselves, and honest with God.

Wisdom Everywhere

Not long ago I was reading the book, Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker. It’s an excellent book about Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD), which is a condition we can develop if we suffer traumatic abuse and neglect in childhood. CPTSD involves some of the main symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) along with extra symptoms.

This book is full of great info, and it gave me great insight into some of my wounds from childhood as well as some of my behaviors. The Wisdom contained in Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving has already had a significant impact on me, and I thank the LORD for the book and its author. And I say that even though the Wisdom in this book is secular and non-Spiritual.

It may be a secular book, written by a secular author, but there is no doubt at all in my Spirit that it was the LORD who moved me to read this book. And I can say that because the book helped me to see things differently and view my childhood wounds in a new way. These insights are precious, and I expect they’re life-changing too. Helpful, life-changing Wisdom can come from anywhere, including the secular world. The LORD knows what we need and guides us to it. That’s why there is no doubt in my Soul that it was the LORD who guided me to read Complex PTSD by Pete Walker.

Anyway, early on in the book there’s a chapter about the importance of not denying our childhood abuse and the severe wounds it caused. If we’re in denial about how badly we were wounded by childhood trauma, it creates a huge obstacle for healing the long-lasting damage caused by those wounds.

It’s pretty obvious: Imagine if we have a deadly illness, but we deny we have it. In that case we would ignore all treatment, and not even think about treatment. Of course we can’t heal from an illness if we deny we even have it!! It’s the same way with the trauma of our childhood wounds. If we deny we were traumatized by our childhood, we won’t heal from the aftereffects trauma creates.

We have to be honest with ourselves and with the LORD if we want to move forward after abuse. And on that note, let’s talk about Spiritual healing.

Spiritual Healing

Healing on a psychological level is vital for recovering and having a good life after trauma. But do you know what’s even more important than psychological healing?? Spiritual healing. That’s the most important healing of all.

Only Jesus has the power to truly heal these deep-rooted, long-lasting wounds in our heart. The root of all our trauma is a Spiritual matter.

When we have childhood trauma, we weren’t loved or protected enough as children. Someone failed us. To heal the negative emotions tormenting our psyche as a result, we need the healing Love of Jesus.

Nothing else can help us in a permanent way. Anything less than the healing Love of Jesus is an incomplete, short-term fix.

Only Jesus can heal our Spiritual wounds. But before He will do that, we must accept Him and invite Him into the pain of our wounds. We have to ask Him to enter into the pain of these wounds, and heal them. Or we could even ask Him to enter into the pain of our inner child, and heal them. Whatever the case, we can’t invite Jesus into the pain of our wounds for healing if we deny the wounds exist. We have to admit, to both Him and ourselves, that we have these wounds before Jesus will heal them. He wants us to know what the problem is, for our own good, and know we need healing for it.

When we invite Jesus into the pain of our wounds, He gets to work quick. We won’t feel better instantaneously, but He does work pretty fast at times.

I’ve asked Jesus for help like this on many different occasions. Sometimes when I’m feeling lonely, I admit to Jesus that I’m lonely and ask Him to enter the pain of my loneliness and help me. And He does; the loneliness doesn’t last long. Sometimes I think of my childhood and get angry at my parents. I ask Jesus to enter into the pain of the wounds they caused me, and He does. I become more able to Forgive, though sometimes I’m still a bit reluctant (and that’s my problem).

The point is, when we ask Jesus for help, He is happy to help. It’s like how when we ask a doctor for help with something, they see what the problem is and they help us. The big difference is that Jesus knows us perfectly on a level the doctor can never hope to understand. So Jesus can give us help that the doctor could never hope to give.

But both Jesus and the doctor won’t help us if we don’t go to them and ask for the help. That part, at least, is the same.

Denial Doesn’t Help

If nothing else, please understand this clearly: It does us NO GOOD to deny we have wounds, to deny that we’re hurting. That only harms us, and delays or prevents us from reaching out for the help we need.

Think back to the example from earlier. Imagine having a fatal, but treatable, illness. What good does it do us to deny we have it, and ignore it?? What good does it do us to avoid treatment for it, and let it run amok in our body??

It goes without saying that would be a foolish and self-destructive choice. Since our lives are precious gifts from God and our bodies are temples for the Holy Spirit, such a neglectful and self-destructive choice for our physical health would anger the LORD.

Well, when we deny the wounds in our heart and psyche, we’re more or less doing the same thing. These scars can come from childhood abuse and trauma, or from other sources, but when we have wounds we need to be honest about it. And we have to be honest about how bad these wounds have damaged our life. We have to seek treatment for them, from the only doctor who can permanently heal us. But of course we can never seek treatment from anywhere, if we deny we have a problem.

The LORD can see the truth of our situation, and knows we’re hurting. He knows exactly how we’ve been wounded, on a psychological and Spiritual level. He knows more about us than we could ever hope to know in our whole lifetime. He could heal us of our pain in a heartbeat, if He Wills it.

But the LORD knows that for our genuine healing, we need to see our wounds for ourselves. When we look at them, it’s not fun or easy. But it will lead to healing if we’re honest with ourselves and don’t deny the truth.

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Until next time, be strong and do good!

Your new best friend in Christ,

99:9

<<<EXALT THE LORD OUR GOD AND WORSHIP AT HIS HOLY HILL; FOR THE LORD OUR GOD IS HOLY>>>

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